But (you will say) why not ask the hatter or some intimate friend to
select the hat for you? I guessed you would suggest that. But it won't
help; I'll tell you why. Some years ago I knew a fat man with a big
head--a journalist of great ability--who made himself undignified by
perching upon the top of that great and capable head a little bowler.
Its inadequacy had always annoyed me, but never more so than when, on
my arriving at our place of servitude one morning (we were on the same
paper) in a new and perfectly becoming hat, he said to me, "That hat's
all wrong. You should never choose a hat for yourself. I _never_ do.
I get my wife to choose mine for me." Remembering this I am even more
unsettled than before. I see no hope.
* * * * *
[Illustration: _Mistress_. "OH, HE'S GONE INTO THE TRENCHES, HAS HE?
WELL, YOU MUSTN'T WORRY."
_Maid_. "OH, NO, MA'AM, I'VE LEFT OFF WORRYING NOW. HE CAN'T WALK OUT
WITH ANYONE ELSE WHILE HE'S THERE."]
* * * * *
OUR BOOKING-OFFICE.
(_BY MR. PUNCH'S STAFF OF LEARNED CLERKS_.)
The idea of publishing _Frederick the Great: The Memoirs of his
Reader, Henri de Catt_ (_1758-1760_) (CONSTABLE) was that we are all
so passionate against Prussianism that we want to plank down our money
for two volumesful of observations at first hand about the man who was
the source and origin of that dark and swollen stream. Personally,
we doubt the general zeal in this matter--not of Prussianism but of
FREDERICK.
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