But the moment Letty's heart had thus cried out against Mary,
came a shock, and something else cried out against herself,
telling her that she was not fair to her friend, and that Mary,
and no other, was the proper person to advise with in this
emergency of her affairs. She had no right to turn from her
because she was a little afraid of her. Perhaps Letty was on the
point of discovering that to be unable to bear disapproval was an
unworthy weakness. But in her case it came nowise of the pride
which blame stirs to resentment, but altogether of the self-
depreciation which disapproval rouses to yet greater dispiriting.
Praise was to her a precious thing, in part because it made her
feel as if she could go on; blame, a misery, in part because it
made her feel as if all was of no use, she never could do
anything right. She had not yet learned that the right is the
right, come of praise or blame what may. The right will produce
more right and be its own reward--in the end a reward altogether
infinite, for God will meet it with what is deeper than all
right, namely, perfect love. But the more Letty thought, the more
she was sure she must tell Mary; and, disapprove as she might,
Mary was a very different object of alarm from either her aunt or
her cousin Godfrey.
The first afternoon, therefore, on which she thought her aunt
could spare her, she begged leave to go and see Mary.
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