She has been impregnated by Jesus, and this imaginary pregnancy
pre-occupies her in the highest degree. From this time she masturbated
daily. She cannot even go to communion without experiencing voluptuous
sensations. Her delusions having thus become systematized, nothing shakes
her tenacity in seeking to carry them out; she attempts at all costs to
have relations with her confessor, embraces him, throws herself at his
knees, pursues him, and so becomes a cause of scandal. When brought to the
asylum, there is intense sexual excitement, and she masturbates a dozen
times a day, even when talking to the doctor. The sexual organs are
normal, the vulva moist and red, the vagina is painful to touch; the
contact of the finger causes erectile turgescence. She has had no rest,
she says, since she has learned to love her Jesus. He desires her to have
sexual relations with someone, and she cannot succeed; 'all my soul's
strength is arrested by this constant endeavor.' Her new surroundings
modify her behavior, and now it is the doctor whom she pursues with her
obsessions. 'I expected everything from the charity of the priests I have
known; I have not deserved what I wanted from them. But is not a doctor
free to do everything for the good of the patients intrusted to him by
Providence? Cannot a doctor thus devote himself? Since I have tasted the
tree of life I am tormented by the desire to share it with a loving
friend.
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