For a little while the
habit took the shape of an exalted passion, but I rapidly tired
it out by rough, thoughtless, and too impatient handling.
Revulsion set in with the pain of an exhausted and badly used
nervous system, and finding myself the slave of a passion, I
determined to endeavor to be its master.
"In conclusion, I should say that masturbation has proved itself
to be to me one of the blind turnings of my life's history, from
which I have gained much valuable experience."
The practice was, however, by no means thus dismissed. Some time
later the subject writes: "I have again restarted masturbation
for the relief of localized feelings. One morning I was engaged
in reading a very heavy volume which, for convenience sake, I
held in my lap, leaning back on my chair. I had become deep in
my study for an hour or so when I became aware of certain
feelings roused by the weight of the book. Being tempted to see
what would happen by such conduct, I shifted so that the edge of
the volume came in closer contact. The pleasurable feelings
increased, so I gave myself up to my emotions for some thirty
minutes.
"Notwithstanding the intense pleasure I enjoyed for so long a
period, I maintain that it is wiser to refrain, and, although I
admit in the same breath that, by gentle treatment, such pleasure
may be harmless to the general health, it does lead to a desire
for solitude, which is not conducive to a happy frame of mind.
Pages:
467
468
469
470
471
472
473
474
475
476
477
478
479
480
481
482
483
484
485
486
487
488
489
490
491