Can one be surprised at the force of a habit, the
slightest infractions of which are punished with such atrocious
shame? As to the utility of modesty, it is the mother of love. As
to the mechanism of the feeling, nothing is simpler. The mind is
absorbed in feeling shame instead of being occupied with desire.
Desires are forbidden, and desires lead to actions. It is evident
that every tender and proud woman--and these two things, being
cause and effect, naturally go together--must contract habits of
coldness which the people whom she disconcerts call prudery. The
power of modesty is so great that a tender woman betrays herself
with her lover rather by deeds than by words. The evil of
modesty is that it constantly leads to falsehood." (Stendhal, _De
l'Amour_, Chapter XXIV.)
It thus happens that, as Adler remarks (_Die Mangelhafte
Geschlechtsempfindung des Weibes_, p. 133), the sexual impulse in
women is fettered by an inhibition which has to be conquered. A
thin veil of reticence, shyness, and anxiety is constantly cast
anew over a woman's love, and her wooer, in every act of
courtship, has the enjoyment of conquering afresh an oft-won
woman.
An interesting testimony to the part played by modesty in
effecting the union of the sexes is furnished by the fact--to
which attention has often been called--that the special modesty
of women usually tends to diminish, though not to disappear, with
the complete gratification of the sexual impulses.
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