Oh,
how shall I ever, _ever_ endure it!"
I was so nervous that I began shaking inside, and I had to speak very
slowly to keep my voice from shaking too. "Don't talk so foolishly,
Fee," I said,--but not unkindly, you know. "Why, I don't know what we'd
all do without you,--having you to ask things of, and to tell us what to
do. I know papa depends on you an awful lot; and Miss Marston said the
day she went away that she wouldn't've gone if she hadn't known you
would be here to look after us and keep things straight; and what
_would_ Nannie do without you? Talk about being of no use,--just think
what you've saved Phil from!"
"I _am_ thankful for that," broke in Felix, "most _thankful_! I don't
regret what I did that night, Jack. I'd do it again if need be, even
knowing that it must end like _this_,"--with a despairing motion of his
hand toward his helpless legs.
Then he added eagerly, breathlessly, "Don't ever tell Phil about this
morning, Jack,--that I feel so terribly about the accident. Don't tell
him,--'twould break his heart. I hope he'll _never_ know. I pretended
to be cheerful, I laughed and talked to cheer him up, but my heart grew
heavier and heavier, and my head felt as if it were being wound up; I
was afraid I'd go mad and tell the whole thing out.
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