They drank and gambled; they said all young fellows did it,
and they laughed at me when I objected. I held out for a good
while,--then one night I gave in. I was a fool; I dreaded their
ridicule. There were times, though, when I was _disgusted_ with myself.
Then I began to win at cards, and--well--I thought I'd save the money
for a purpose; though in my heart I knew full well that--the--the--the
person I was saving for wouldn't touch a penny got that way. Well, then
something happened that made that money I was saving quite unnecessary,
and then I just played to lose. I wanted those fellows to have their
money back; after that I thought I'd cut loose from 'em. That was the
reason I wanted to go back to Chad's that night,--was it _only_ last
night? It seems like _years_ ago!"
Phil dropped his face down in his hands for a minute; then he went on:
"I started out this morning and gave each of the fellows his money back.
They didn't want to take it,--they think me a crazy loon; but I
insisted. I've got beyond caring for their opinion. And now, Fee, the
rest of my life belongs to you; you've paid an awful price for it, old
fellow,--I'm not worth it.
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