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Twain, Mark, 1835-1910

"The American Claimant"

It is only an offense and a wrong
when it is restricted to a favored few. But Miss--er--"
"Hattie."
"Miss Hattie, be frank; confess that that title isn't accorded by
everybody to everybody. The rich American doesn't call her cook a lady--
isn't that so?"
"Yes, it's so. What of it?"
He was surprised and a little disappointed, to see that his admirable
shot had produced no perceptible effect.
"What of it?" he said. "Why this: equality is not conceded here, after
all, and the Americans are no better off than the English. In fact
there's no difference."
"Now what an idea. There's nothing in a title except what is put into
it--you've said that yourself. Suppose the title is 'clean,' instead of
'lady.' You get that?"
"I believe so. Instead of speaking of a woman as a lady, you substitute
clean and say she's a clean person."
"That's it. In England the swell folks don't speak of the working people
as gentlemen and ladies?"
"Oh, no."
"And the working people don't call themselves gentlemen and ladies?"
"Certainly not."
"So if you used the other word there wouldn't be any change. The swell
people wouldn't call anybody but themselves 'clean,' and those others
would drop sort of meekly into their way of talking and they wouldn't
call themselves clean.


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