... Well, one o' the Edgewood boys bate one o' the Pleasant River
boys that they could tell which one of 'em was the laziest by the way
they come down that hill.... So they all watched, 'n' bime by, when Jabe
was most down to the bottom of the hill, they was struck all of a heap
to see him break into a kind of a jog trot 'n' run down the balance o'
the way. Well, then, they fell to quarrelin'; for o' course the Pleasant
River folks said Aaron Peek was the laziest, 'n' the Edgewood boys
declared he hedn't got no such record for laziness's Jabe Slocum hed;
an' when they was explainin' of it, one way 'n' 'nother, Elder Banks
come along, 'n' they asked him to be the judge. When he heerd tell how
't was, he said he agreed with the Edgewood folks that Jabe was lazier
'n Aaron. 'Well, I snum, I don't see how you make that out,' says the
Pleasant River boys; 'for Aaron walked down, 'n' Jabe run a piece o' the
way.' 'If Jabe Slocum run,' says the elder, as impressive as if he was
preachin',--'if Jabe Slocum ever run, then 't was because he was _too
doggoned lazy to hold back!_ 'an' that settled it!... (No, I couldn't
eat another mossel, Miss Cummins; I've made out a splendid supper.) ...
You can't git such pie 'n' doughnuts anywhere else in the village, 'n'
what I say I mean.... Do you make your riz doughnuts with emptin's? I
want to know! Si says there's more faculty in cookin' flour food than
there is in meat-victuals, 'n' I guess he's 'bout right.
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